Animals

Resplendent Tree Moose Found in Bernal Back Yard

/ Todd_Lappin

** EXCLUSIVE! MUST CREDIT BERNALWOOD!**

Researchers working in a remote Bernal Heights back yard recently made a most startling discovery: The Resplendent Tree Moose, captured during a rare moment of repose in his leafy refuge. Prof. Mason of the Bernalwood Exotic Species Project sends us this exclusive footage:

In this episode of Wild Kingdom, we track, at dusk, the Resplendent Moose in his native tree top habitat of Bernal Heights. Witness the careful attention to detail as it dons its ritual “sleeping mask” all while resting comfortably in the high tree tops it calls “home.” Never before seen on camera is the pre-bed time appliqué of pajama bottoms over-the-underwear-mask. This behavior is unexplained and we can only subject it to the scientific community at large for advice, comment and explanation.

Artist Captures Dog vs. Gopher Confrontation on Bernal Hill

/ Todd_Lappin / 6 Comments

Neighbor Laurie, who has a wonderful propensity to paint watercolors instead of snapping photos, brings us this terrific image that captures the Wild Kingdom drama of a canine/rodent confrontation on Bernal Hill. She writes:

This dog was staring intently at a hole on the west side of the hill, which was inhabited by some small rodent (a gopher?) that kept poking its head up and then ducking back down again. I was amused by the idea that this large muscular dog was completely powerless to catch the tiny rodent.

Bernal Heights Marsupial Makes Rare Daytime Appearance

/ Todd_Lappin / 28 Comments

Neighbor Ken on Rutledge writes:

Marsupial in the hood!

This guy’s been puttering around our north slope yard late at night. My Jack Russell has been on to him, but no confrontations as yet. I’ve only caught glimpses of his beady reflective eyes every now and then shining back at me in the darkness. I guess he must have heard about the brash, Bernal raccoons. This morning he was cruising our fence looking for the best way to take advantage of our wild bird feeders. Out in the bright daylight, he didn’t even flinch when I approached him to grab this shot. (Fact: Opossums have been known to play dead for 40 minutes to 4 hours before coming back to “life.”)

He seems healthy but then, what the heck do I know about Opossums?

Note: We’ve lived on the hill for over 22 years and this is a first for us. We’ve seen Opossums at night but never in the day.

PHOTO: Neighbor Ken

Pint-Size Easter Egg Hunter-Gatherers Invade Holly Park

/ Bronwyn Ximm / 2 Comments

The Easter Bunny eggs on three poachers.

At 10 a.m. sharp on Easter Sunday, the madding crowd could be constrained no longer. “Go!” a voice rang out.

And with that, Holly Park was engulfed in a sea of pastel-clad marauders. Unabashedly abetted by their parents, the young hunter-gatherers snatched up dozens upon dozens of defenseless, brightly colored Easter eggs, easily discerning their cleverly camouflaged nesting sites scattered throughout the rugged terrain’s grasses, tree trunks, and wood chips.

A mere 15 minutes later, not a single egg remained.

How, one wonders, can this species continue to propagate year after year?  Equally perplexing is why there were not just one but two Easter Bunnies on the scene this year. Are these mysteries connected?

I couldn’t get a straight answer out of either Bunny regarding the eggs, but here’s what they said in regards to their presence:

Easter Bunny #1: “We rabbits have a proclivity for multiplication. Also, there’s so much work to do—there are sooo many kids.”

Easter Bunny #2: “I’m having a bit of split personality today.”

Regardless, this video captures the mayhem as it unfolded on Sunday morning:

PHOTO: Bronwyn Ximm

Renegade Raccoons Invade Bernal Heights Homes

/ Todd_Lappin / 22 Comments

backyard bandit

There was a burglary recently on the south side of Bernal Heights. The culprits were clever thieves who always wear a mask. Neighbor Sharon called it in:

Two racoons broke into next door neighbors’ home through their small pet door (they have dachshunds) and at 1:30am started crashing through kitchen looking for food. Neighbors screamed and banged around—and finally uninvited racoons left.

Next day neighbors mentioned the story to another neighbor, who said that (presumably same pair) of racoons broke through a cracked window and into THEIR house.

We recently had noticed things a few minor things amiss in the garden (lids off cans, wood chips chewed, pet door knocked off), but didn’t think they were related. Now I’m thinking it’s probably all these crafty critters.

Maybe this isn’t the proper place for posting racoon warnings, but I’d want to know if there was a pair of marauding racoons nearby—and so—I’m locking up the pet door securely and telling y’all about what I know.

These are not isolated incidents. Last weekend my North Bernal home was invaded by these fearless feral fiends. They raided the pantry and ate all our brown sugar. They left behind a big mess… and this tell-tale calling card:

UPDATE: (Promoted from the comments) Neighbor Angelo shared this video of raccoons examining his sliding door with an eye toward a) understanding the intricacies of modern sliding door technology and b) getting in to plunder:

PHOTOS: Top, pagedesign. Below, Telstar Logistics

Humans Prevail, Barely, in Standoff With Militant Raccoons

/ Todd_Lappin / 10 Comments

There is a siege underway on Eugenia Avenue, as clever, four-legged creatures with fiendishly nimble thumbs have declared war on a family of Bernal bipeds. Neighbors Limor and Lisha report from the front lines:

We thought we’d share this with the Bernalistas… Two very daring raccoons have been having a night war with us, which lately stretched into the early mornings.

Pentagon sources tell Bernalwood that SEAL Team Six is standing by to assist if necessary.

PHOTO: Neighbor Limor

Amphibious Creature Discovered In Bernal Heights Back Yard

/ Todd_Lappin / 15 Comments

Neighbor Todd recently put on his pith helmet to embark upon an animal expedition in his back yard. He made a shocking discovery: creepy amphibians!

Your recent dispatch on Jerusalem crickets had me wondering what else lived in my yard, and not long ago, I found a pair of salamanders — yes salamanders — hiding out beneath a board. One of them found more private accommodations before I could return and take a picture, but I wanted to share the photographic evidence for your local wildlife files. Who knew salamanders lived in San Francisco? According to my research, this specimen is a California slender salamander.

Fascinating. Though the creature looks somewhat snake-like, this closeup of a California slender salamander grabbed from Wikipedia reveals that they actually walk on legs, and are actually rather cute (in that salamander sort of way):

However, latent cuteness cannot allow us to overlook the potential public safety menace posed by these delightful Bernalphibians. Because they are, after all, amphibious reptile-like creatures. And for all we know, they could potentially be cross-species allies of another amphibious reptile-like creature whose presence here would be much less charming:

Bernalzilla!

PHOTOS: Top, Todd Dayton; middle, Wikipedia; bottom, Telstar Logistics

Vote: Which Costumed Canine Is Cutest of All?

/ Todd_Lappin / 2 Comments

Remember the doggie fashion show organized by fitBernalfit during the 2011 Holiday Stroll on Cortland? Well, the dogs showed up to strut their stuff, and many photos were taken, so now it’s time for the Citizens of Bernalwood to decide which dog is cutest of all.

The vote is happening at Fit Bernal Fit’s page on the Facebook:

Please vote only ONCE by commenting under the picture of the the dog you think should win the 2011 Holiday Winter Wear Competition, not just liking the photo. Each comment counts as a vote (only one vote per person please). The winner will receive an on-location Dog Portrait photo shoot within San Francisco from Photography by Jean Pedigo.  A $250 value! Voting ends Dec. 31st!!!!

This means that come next week, when you’re sick of hanging out with your family and relatives, you can slip away to the computer for a few minutes to review the canine competitors and absorb a little cuteness. Review the 2011 fBf Winter Wear Competition album, and cast your vote!

PHOTOS: fit Bernal fit

New Bernal Heights Art Print Celebrates Our Spirit Animal

/ Todd_Lappin / 16 Comments

A few months ago, the graphic designers at TheGRQP released a series of wildlife-themed prints about San Francisco neighborhoods. Pacific Heights is a fox. The Castro is a peacock. Japantown is a goldfish. And so on.

The prints were lovely, but one neighborhood was conspicuously missing: Bernal Heights.

So in an email, I says to them, I says:

Hey! What about Bernal Heights??! We’re famous! We’re glamorous! Plus, I’ll do the research for you. Here is the animal you should associate with our neighborhood.

They received my suggestion warmly, and now the Bernal Heights print is available for sale.

San Francisco’s neighborhoods have such personality, and we at the GRQP believe each tends to bear a likeness to a particular animal. High atop their perch at the microwave tower, these owls watch over Bernal Heights. Every night they remain vigilant for the residents and wildlife alike. It is these owl’s dusk to dawn duty, nay, their nocturnal mission to keep this neighborhood safe. Whether you live in Bernal Heights or not, with these owls on your wall, you won’t help but feel protected.

Notice also the cameo appearance by Sutrito Tower.

Yaaay! The image 11×14, and printed on archival paper. And just $22! I just ordered one for the Cub Reporter’s bedroom.

Canine Costume Contest, During Cortland Holiday Stroll

/ Todd_Lappin / 1 Comment

In the ecumenical spirit of the 2011 Cortland Holiday Stroll tomorrow night, there’s a special event for our canine friends during the evening’s festivities, as part of Fit Bernal Fit’s superchic Doggie Holiday Winter Wear fashion contest.

fBf & Photography by Jean Pedigo’s annual Doggie Holiday Winter Wear contest returns 12/8/11 from 6-9 pm during Bernal’s Holiday Stroll! Get your dog’s winter wear ready. All dogs are welcome to participate.

Step it up, style hounds, and we’ll see you on the street.


PHOTO: A 2010 contestant,  via Fit Bernal Fit

Ho-Ho-Ho! The Holiday Stroll Comes to Cortland Thursday Eve

/ Todd_Lappin / 3 Comments

Holiday Stroll

Holiday Stroll

Last year was the first-ever Holiday Stroll on Cortland, and as you can see from the nostalgia-tinged photos above, it was glamorous, festive, and fun. It was so much fun, in fact, that the Bernal Business Alliance has decided to do it again this year, on Thursday, December 8, 2011 from 6-9 pm. The BBA sayeth:

Last year’s inaugural holiday stroll was such a success that – yes, you guessed it – we’re doing it again! […]

This year it will be even better…

  • live music
  • refreshments, treats and wine tasting
  • carol singing with the San Francisco Boys Chorus
  • special offers and competitions

And of course, more than 30 of our local businesses will be open late from 6pm through 9pm so you can take a leisurely stroll through the neighborhood without all the crazy downtown crowds and get your Christmas Shopping done a little early.

So wrap up warm and come and support your local merchants while having some seasonal fun at the 2nd Annual Bernal Heights Holiday Stroll!

PHOTOS: Top, Telstar Logistics