Rebel blogger Burrito Justice, chief propagandist of the La Lengua separatists, looked into his cartographic crystal ball recently to understand the impact that global climate change and sea-level rise might have upon our City.
His research generated some bittersweet conclusions. Assuming a worst-case scenario of 200-feet of sea-level rise, San Francisco will become an archipelago. That’s bad news for his beloved La Lengua Autonomous Zone, which will be completely submerged beneath the rising waters. But on the bright side, Bernal Hill will be transformed into a glamorous island with excellent luxury vacation destination potential.
Let’s zoom in for a closer look:
In a must-read post written from the perspective of the year 2072, Burrito Justice envisions life in the San Francisco Archipelago:
With the surprising acceleration of sea level rise due to the melting of both the Greenland and Antarctic ice sheets over the past decade, ferry service has been announced between the new major islands of the San Franciscan Archipelago while the boring machines make progress under the Van Ness Passage and Richmond Pass for the new transit tunnels. […]
The submerged ruins of the Sunset and the Mission have proved popular diving attractions, [and] many have already forgotten the locations of long-flooded streets and avenues. […]
While other islands have embraced both bridges and tunnels — the 150 year old bridges across Glen Narrows are scheduled for destruction once the new suspension bridge is completed to Bernal Isle.
What’s fascinating is the fact that Bernal Isle of 2072 is quite a bit like the Bernal Heights of 2012: A scenic haven that’s just slightly cut off from the rest of the City. But Bernal Isle will also enjoy some competitive advantages that Bernal Heights does not; most notably, ample beachfront real estate and convenient tourist access to the submerged ruins of the former Mission District.
Fellow Citizens of Bernalwood, we have an exciting future to look forward to!
IMAGES: Top, Telstar Logistics. Archipelago maps, courtesy of Burrito Justice.