Bonkers Real Estate in Bernal Heights Is Totally Bonkers

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It might be the relatively large size of the home at 11 Wright in Bernal’s northeast corner, or maybe the modern amenities and handsome finishes. Or perhaps it’s the effects of a hallucinogenic drug that’s somehow entered our water supply…

Whatever the cause, we must note that CurbedSF gets it just right in a story by Miss Sally that runs under the headline, “Bonkers Real Estate”:

Do check out the sale of 11 Wright in Bernal Heights for your daily dose of San Francisco residential real estate madness. The 3-bed, 2,220-square-foot home was put on the market in mid-November asking $1.299M, and it just sold for $1.5M. That’s $201K over asking.

That is completely bonkers.

PHOTO: via Redfin

GreenLid Fills Green, Smoothie-Sized Void at 331 Cortland

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Bernalwood must have slept through the alarm, because somehow we missed the news that GreenLid Smoothies had opened in the glamorous 331 Cortland food marketplace. But for the fact that we recently had to refill our supply of Paulie’s Pickles, it might have taken even longer for us to bring you this important green drink news. For this Bernalwood can only apologize.

Regardless, lovers of blended green kale-based smoothie drinks will be pleased to know that Andrea Talley has opened her GreenLid kiosk in 311 Cortland. She tells us:

Neighbors and fellow green juice lovers,

There is a green mmoothie bar located in Bernal Heights! It’s in the marketplace at 331 Cortland Avenue. At long last the wait is over.

What’s a green smoothie, you ask? Unlike juice, green smoothies maintain all of the fiber and nutrients of the whole fruit and leafy green. Each smoothie is made with fresh, local fruit and vegetables like kale, avocado, apples and oranges. There are no added sugars, no preservatives and each smoothie is gluten-free and vegan!

GreenLid Smoothies began making fresh, all natural green goodness last year- delivering smoothies to commercial offices around the city. Toward the end of the year, they decided to open the doors to the public. When you go to the smoothie bar, you’ll see (and recognize) every ingredient that goes into the blender and taste the freshness.

Right now there are three flavors on the menu: Almond Banana, Apple Ginger and Orange Mango. These smoothies are seriously good! Check them out at 331 Cortland Avenue.

PHOTO: Andrea Talley, by Telstar Logistics

Your Bernal Heights Crime Report for December 2013: Alemany Homicide Update and Burglary Is the New Drug Dealing

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Neighbor Sarah, your vigilant volunteer Bernal Heights crime reporter, attended the SFPD Ingleside Community meeting just before the Xmas/New Year break, and she filed these summary notes on current Bernal Heights crime trends.

Before we jump into that, however, there’s a quick update on the fatal shooting that took place at the Alemany housing project on December 14. The SFPD now believes that Clifton Chapman, the teen who died at the scene, was a participant in the robbery that preceded the shooting. The San Francisco Examiner reports:

A teenager was arrested in connection with the Dec. 14 homicide of 16-year-old Clifton Chatman, police Sgt. Danielle Newman said Friday.

Two people were shot that day in the Bernal Heights area, and police say the shootings happened during the course of an attempted robbery.

The intended robbery victim was walking in the 500 block of Alemany Boulevard near Ellsworth Street some time after 11 p.m. The victim was surrounded by a group of teenage boys, and one of the boys demanded the victim’s cellphone. One of the boys pulled out a handgun while the others rifled through the victim’s belongings.

Although the victim complied with suspect’s demands, the boy with the gun shot the victim in the face, Newman said, but the shot glanced off his face and struck Chatman, who was reportedly one of the robbery suspects.

Now, on to Neighbor Sarah’s regular crime summary:

Notes from Ingleside Meeting, 12/17/13

Captain Falvey presided.  He has now been captain at Ingleside for 15 months.

CRIME TRENDS (see attached Compstat report):

November was pretty good – key arrests + education campaigns likely led to low crime for the month.  Got 20+ guns off the streets early in the month.

First 15 days of the month – 17 robberies.
Then made a few key arrests.
Last 15 days of the month – 3 robberies.

2013 started out very high with robberies — this has improved with arrests, but, as we know in Bernal, that doesn’t mean the accused will stay locked up for long, so we should not get complacent.

City-wide, crime is up 13% YTD.  In our district, it’s up 7%.

GANG TRENDS
Over the past several years, gangs have shifted from drug-dealing to stealing cell phones.  Now moving on to property crimes (e.g., auto boosts) because they can efficiently get property to sell and face lower penalties than for robbery.  Police believe gangs are coaching one another to shift to break-ins and burglaries.

BURGLARIES
Lots of entries through garage doors (41% of burglaries in district last month were through garage).  Remember to take your garage-door openers inside when you leave your car and make sure all entry points to your garage (and from garage to house) are secure).

Continuing trend of houses being built or remodeled getting broken into – tools & appliances stolen.  Don’t use realtor-style lockboxes to hold keys! These can be pried open.  Also seeing theft of Ford Econoline vans subsequently used in appliance robberies.

Call police if you see this happening to a neighbor’s house. Remember: would you want someone to call if they saw this going on at your home?

HOMICIDES
City at 47 homicides YTD for 2013 (five years ago, it was 94).
Homicide at 580 Alemany – investigation continuing (See update above).  First homicide in district in 66 days.

PAROLEES
Question about how police keep track of parolees and people on probation.  SFPD works with those departments and does Fugitive Recovery Team days where multiple agencies sweep an area and visit the parolees and people on probation in a given area.

TRAFFIC SAFETY
Traffic accidents are up this year city-wide. Drivers, slow down!  Pedestrian safety initiative going on.  More people than ever are on bikes, too.  Ingleside has 20% of city’s intersections.

GUEST SPEAKER
Sarah Nichols, Community Boards
(415) 920-3820

She’s an attorney and got involved with Community Boards this year.
They resolve disputes through mediation. Oldest public mediation service in US.
Help parties find resolution themselves.
Often disputes are among neighbors, roommates, HOAs, families
$40 to open a case – can be waived for harship
17,000 local mediators trained since inception
85% of disputing parties have approved of outcome
Confidential, safe
You contact Community Boards – they contact 2nd party (you don’t have to)
1-3 mediators per issue, 3 hour mediation (can be daytime, night, weekend)
Mediators are matched to disputing parties in terms of age, demographics, language, etc.

UPCOMING EVENTS:
Ingleside district gun buyback will be April 5 – save the date!

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PHOTO: Top, Telstar Logistics

Yarn-Bombers Stage Daring Infiltration at Precita Playground

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Happy New Year!

We begin 2014 with news of a surprise direct-action by members of the knitting underground on two trees located at the eastern end of Precita Park, inside the beloved children’s playground.

Analysts from the FBI and Knitting World magazine have examined the guerilla stitch-work, and determined it to be of exceptionally high quality. No one knows who was responsible for this daring infiltration, but we can say this: They were pros.

Meanwhile, Neighbor Noah reports that denizens of the playground have responded to the yarning with squeals of glee and occasional tree hugs:

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PHOTOS: Top, Linda Burbank; Middle, Karen Zuercher; Below, Noah Lang

Incredible!! Bernal’s Mutant “Mossquatch” Challenges Santa Claus Hegemony

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Someone better call Fox News, because the “War on Christmas” has now become an insurgency.

Bernalwood interrupts your holiday preparations to bring you this important accouncement: Mossquatch, the mutant Bryophyta-Homo Sapien hybrid who lives inside a meter-reading hole on the corner of Bocana and Eugenia, has embraced some seasonal Xmoss cheer.

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Neighbor Allison reports live from the scene:

Looks like the man in a red suit has some competition. Mossquatch is back and doling out moss to all the good little children this holiday season. Seems he still may have something to learn from the real Santa Claus!

PHOTO: Top: Neighbor Allison. Exterior: Telstar Logistics

Young Photography Superstar Displaying Work at Cafe St. Jorge

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Neighbor David is the proud father of Neighbor Sarabeth Spector, who at age 13 has been dubbed the hottest new photographer in Bernal Heights.

So with understandable pride, Davis is spreading the word that some of Sarabeth’s photos are currently on display at Cafe St. Jorge on Mission near Cortland:

My Daughter Sarabeth has her first solo photo show from now until Mid-Jan 2014 at Cafe St. Jorge (3438 Mission St) Some very nice photos – please check ’em out … (and also, Andrea de Francisco has a great cafe – if you haven’t had a change to try it, please do: Good food, great coffee, great atmosphere and a friendly staff!)

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PHOTOS: Proud Neighbor David

This Weekend: Open Studio at Recycled Glassworks on Bonview

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Last minute announcement (my fault) and Xmas shopping opportunity! Neighbor Lauren is having open studio event at her Recycled Glassworks workshop on fashionable Bonview Street this weekend. She tells us:

With all the recent home sales in Bernal Heights come plenty remodels. Out with the old, in with the new. Where do the old windows go to die?

They may find their way to my Recycled Glassworks studio where the glass starts a new life as handmade, functional tableware.

This weekend, I’m inviting neighbors and friends for Open Studio:

Saturday and Sunday (December 21-22), 12pm-5pm.
238 Bonview Street, just half a block up from Cortland Ave.

It’s a nice way to peruse my entire collection, and a great opportunity for last-minute holiday gifts. There will be many specials at outlet prices.

Who knows, if you had home remodel recently, you may see your old windows again, – in a new light.

“PizzaHacker” Opening in Bernal, Ending Our Pizza Deprivation

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Citizens of Bernalwood, our long neighborhood nightmare of subpar pizza has come to an end. No longer shall we have to venture beyond the cozy confines of our familiar Bernal terrain to enjoy pizza done right. Destiny and market opportunity have conspired to bring us some very fine pizza. Rejoice!

The PizzaHacker is setting up shop at 3299 Mission Street at 29th, in  the former bank building that was formerly home to Inca’s Peruvian restaurant after it was formerly home to a record store. The PizzaHacker is Jeff Krupman, and he’s not new to the pizza game, having spent the last few years doing pop-ups around town. Foodie critics love love love him, but now he’s planting roots in Bernal Heights, and I’m here to tell you, we are extremely fortunate.

The PizzaHacker will be open for a soft-launch tonight and tomorrow, Friday 12/20 and Saturday 12/21, but we’ll get to that in a moment.

First, let’s talk about the pizza…

Your Bernalwood editor visited the PizzaHacker last night to sample the merchandise. Apart from the installation of a new pizza oven, the old Inca’s space remains largely unchanged for now.

PizzaHacker Jeff was there, so I introduced myself and I ordered a straight-up Marinara pizza to-go. The pie cost $15, and apparently, I was the PizzaHacker’s very first paying customer in the new space. Whoohoo!

Bernalwood’s Cub Reporter was waiting eagerly when I got home, so we quickly began our taste test. The Cub Reporter spent a lot of time studying the pizza arts during summer sojourns on the greasy streets of New York and New Jersey, so her palette in these matters is impeccable. And after just one bite, we both declared our pizza from the PizzaHacker to be “OMG! INCREDIBLE!!”

Here’s the Cub Reporter conducting her taste test:

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And here’s why our pizza was excellent:

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No joke, that was by far the best pizza I’ve had in San Francisco in recent memory. Rejoice!

PizzaHacker business partner Jimmy explains the restaurant’s plan for the next few weeks:

Right now we are still working on the space and will be serving pizza here and there to test things out.  After the soft-opening on Saturday, we are going to shut down completely to build out the bar and work out any finishing touches. We hope to be fully open and servicing the Bernal Community by January 15th. All in all its going to be a pretty simple restaurant.  A few pizzas, a salad or two, beer and wine on tap.

So there you have it.

Run! — don’t walk! — to the PizzaHacker tonight and tomorrow night on Mission at 29th to taste a preview of the coming attractions. Then rest assured that Bernal will soon be home to a pizza place we can all be proud of… at last.

Thank you, PizzaHacker, and welcome to Bernal Heights.

PHOTOS: Telstar Logistics

Is There a Frenchman Buried Under Precita Park?

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Neighbor Vicky from the Bernal Heights History Project calls our attention to an August 12, 1897 article in the San Francisco Call newspaper about a tragic accident that took place while installing a sewer line near Precita Park:

sewerhedThe article goes on to say

The caving in of the southern embankment of a new sewer being put in on Precita Avenue, from Alabama street to Army, was the scane of an unfortunate occurrence yesterday afternoon. In the construction of this sewer a man lost his life by being crushed to death beneath tons of rock and earth, which fell in on top of him while at work in the bottom at a depth of twelve feet.

The name of the unfortunate man could not be ascertained. He was simply known as “Frenchy,” probably because he belonged to that nationality. All that was known of him by the other workmen and the people about Precita Valley was that he took a section of the sewer from George M. Ferine, who was tbe contractor to whom the contract was let’ by the Supervisors. Perine. in turn, gave out sections of the work to any person who applied for a share. “Frenchy” secured fifty feet of contract on the topmost point of the line, where it was found necessary to sink to a depth of twelve feet in order to bring the bottom level to the line.

The unfortunate man had worked hard and faithfully on his job from the time he got the contract until yesterday, when he hopefully announced to some of bis fel-low-workmen that he had just two more feet to dig when his portion of the contract would jbe finished. This was about twenty minutes before the life was crushed out ot his body by the falling earth.

As was the custom of the time, the article goes on to describe the precise circumstances of Frenchy’s demise in gruesome detail. The body was recovered, apparently, but the article provides no additional detail about burial arrangements.

So was Frenchy laid to rest near the site of the accident that claimed his life? Let the legend begin…

Bernal Oenophile Kickstarting Book on “The Essence of Wine”

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Neighbor Alder Yarrow is the founder and editor of the famous Vinography wine blog, and he’s launched a Kickstarter campaign to secure pre-orders for a coffee table book called “The Essence of Wine”:

This book is unlike any wine book ever produced. It is first an art book — an incredible collection of intimate images and accompanying prose that celebrate the different individual flavors and aromas found in wine. It is also an educational book and a wine guide, directing readers to easily findable wines that can broaden their horizons as wine drinkers.

The book will appeal to anyone who enjoys indulging their senses, from the foodie who wants a wine book that doesn’t read like a dictionary, to the wine novice looking to educate their palate. Even the wine connoisseur will return again and again to savor the beauty of these images with wine glass in hand and the book in their lap.

Neighbor Alder’s Kickstarter has an $18,000 goal, with about $62oo remaining (at this writing) before the January 1 cutoff.

IMAGE: Preliminary (non-final) cover mockup of The Essence of Wine