Have Faith: Cute Bernal Heights Home For Sale Cheap(er)

Here’s a handsome opportunity for wannabe Bernalwoodians. (Bernalwooders? Bernalwoodistas?) CurbedSF tells us this spiffy house at 137 Faith Street on Bernal’s east slope is for sale, and now at a lower price:

A few months ago we brought your attention to this cute little place in Bernal Heights. It’s a 2-bed, 1-bath house with a charming shack, er, bonus structure out back. We are suckers for anything painted yellow, so we know we’re biased, but why all the hate on this petite abode? A decently-renovated single-family home is rare in the city for under $600,000, certainly in neighborhoods to the East. The seller is clearly motivated, already taking a hit to the last sale price of $650,000 back in 2005.

SF Supervisors Consider New NIMBY Legislation to Make Sure Your Mobile Reception Stays Terrible

City Hall

History will record that the Great Bernal Hill Antenna War of 2010 was actually just one salvo of a larger conflict over our telecommunications infrastructure that is beginning to rage all over the City and County of San Francisco.

The next battle will take place in the lame-duck chambers of the San Francisco Board of Supervisors, where progressive Supervisor John Avalos will hold public hearings today on a piece of legislation he introduced (with backing from Bernal Heights Supervisor David Campos) to “regulate the placement of [mobile antennas] in order to prevent telecommunications providers from installing wireless antennas and associated equipment in the City’s rights-of-way either in manners or in locations that will diminish the City’s beauty.”

Now, to be clear: I’m pro-beauty. And I’m all for common-sense regulation designed to minimize the visual impact of wireless installations. But San Francisco already regulates antennas on aesthetic grounds, and Avalos’s proposal reads like it was written by a committee of NIMBY nitpickers. You can curl up with the full text (pdf download) of his plan, but the executive summary is that the new legislation would add lots of new red tape to new wireless antenna installations, effectively adding another layer of City bureaucracy to an antenna-permitting process that is already thick with City bureaucracy.

Supervisor Avalos will hold a hearing on his proposal today at 1 pm in front of the City’s Land Use Committee. If you can’t attend the meeting (because you have, you know, a job and a life) public comment can be submitted via Alisa Somera in the Clerk’s office at 415.554.4447 or Alisa.Somera@sfgov.org. (NOTE: Be kind to Alisa, please. The legislation isn’t her idea, nor her fault.)

Meanwhile, I tried to call Supervisor David Campos on Sunday night, to learn more about his apparent support for the Avalos proposal. I placed the call from my home on Bernalwood’s north slope.

Alas, I didn’t get very far…

Calling My Supervisor
Images by Telstar Logistics

A Theory to Explain Why We Don’t Have Many Hipsters In Bernalwood

It’s a question that’s no doubt top-of-mind for every armchair sociologist in the neighborhood: Given our proximity to the Mission, to say nothing of our spiritual and aesthetic affinity to same, why doesn’t Bernal Heights have a higher concentration of hipsters?

My analysis suggests the answer lies squarely at the intersection of Fashion Boulevard and Topography Way. Specifically, the relative dearth of hipsters in Bernalwood can only be explained by the fact that riding around here on a fixie just plain sucks. In the hipster’s obligatory skinny jeans, it may even be impossible. Ergo, few hipsters.

Fixed Gear Bike Poseur - DoneYet in the spirit of good relations, this is ripe fodder for a trans-neighborhood collaboration with our friends at MissionMission or Uptown Almanac.

My proposal is simple: Come springtime, let’s organize the first-ever Bernal Heights Hipster Hillclimb. Fixies and skinny jeans required. Come as you are: No pre-race urine testing to screen for ingestion of 4Loko. Racers start on Folsom at the corner of Cesar Chavez Boulevard. On your mark, get set, GO up up up up Folsom.

Halfway to the finish line on the Folsom Street Hipster Deterrent Barrier

First one to reach the gate at Bernal Heights Park wins a case of PBR.

Who’s in??

Photos: Top: Greg Speck. Bottom: Telstar Logistics. Illustration: Jesse Kulenski

Bernalwood Goes for a Holiday Stroll on Cortland

Holiday Stroll

Holiday Stroll

Holiday Stroll

So we strolled.

Last night the Bernalwood Glam Squad did a promenade up and down Cortland Avenue for the first evar Holiday Stroll. Cortland’s merchants and proprietors opened their doors, poured grog, offered yummy treats, and chatted readily. Neighbors showed up, and they strolled too, giving Bernalwood’s main drag a bustling Main Street buzz. Lovely.

Hope this happens again next year.

Images: Telstar Logistics

Gorgeous Typographic Map of San Francisco Includes Beautiful Typographic Bernal Heights

The designers at Axis Maps just released a very nifty Typographic Map of San Francisco, and since Bernalwood is part of San Francisco, we’re included too. (“They like us! They really like us!”)

One of Axis’s preview images even shows a detail of the southeast corner of Bernal Heights, around the site of Holly Park and the Alemany Farmer’s Market:

Nifty! Copies of the map are available in various sizes from Zazzle.

Hat tip: Laughing Squid

Apartment Therapy *Hearts* This Bernalwood Home

As if we needed any further validation of Bernalwood’s glam and panache, two of our own have a newly published House Tour that’s now up on the decor-obsessed website Apartment Therapy:

Name: Laura and Zev
Location: Bernal Heights — San Francisco, California
Size: 1,000 square feet
Years lived in: 2 — owned

Becoming a homeowner changes your perspective on the space you call home — at least it has for Laura and Zev. When they moved into their new home in Bernal Heights from the Mission two years ago they began to see their home as a true reflection of themselves. They strayed from the loud, flashy colors they painted on the walls of their previous rental and opted for a simpler, cozier way to express their love for color.

Read the entire House Tour here.

Why Your Mobile Service Sucks, and Will Continue to Suck: Blame NIMBY Neighbors and Your San Francisco Supervisors

Listening Post

Next time you feel the urge to curse your wireless carrier for dropped calls and crappy reception, take a deep breath. Then, direct some of your wrath at a handful of NIMBY neighbors and the San Francisco Board of Supervisors.

By now you may have heard about the Great Bernal Hill Antenna Battle of 2010. The conflict involved a plan by Clearwire, a wireless service provider, to install several small microwave antennas — each is about the size of a basketball — on the big-ass microwave tower that has stood atop Bernal Hill since the 1960s.

Long-story-short: A few Bernal residents got wind of Clearwire’s antenna plan and became very very very agitated, on the scientifically dubious grounds that such antennas pose potential health risks. They took their concerns to Bernal’s Supervisor, David Campos, who embraced the effort to halt the installation of the antennas atop the tower which sits atop our beloved Bernal Hill. Supervisor Campos escalated the issue, and in November the San Francisco Board of Supervisors voted to block Clearwire’s antenna plan.

Source: San Francisco Planning Department, via Mission Loc@al

The genuine journalists at Mission Loc@l summarize the politics of the move, and its consequences:

The vote was a clear victory for the anti-antenna movement, and a setback for Clearwire and others trying to install new antennas throughout the city.

The proposed dish antennas would have provided better coverage to the laptops and phones of Clearwire customers in five neighborhoods including the Mission,  Mission Dolores, the Excelsior and Silver Terrace.

Two of the antennas would have connected with two dishes on buildings on Alabama and Valencia streets.  Without them, the sites will continue to be disconnected.  The connections would have improved Clearwire’s service.

That’s the polite version. Last week, CurbedSF took off the gloves to tell it straight:

Source: Curbed SF

Everything was going smoothly and then BOOM, Bernal Heights NIMBYs started circulating emails around about how in the event of an earthquake, the potential antenna could “accidentally zap residents with concentrated radio waves.” They wanted an environmental impact report. Shoot forward to present day and the proposed antenna isn’t going to happen. The Board of Supes voted unanimously this week to repeal the conditional use permit given in July to Clearwire. The reason? They voted against the conditional use permit because the American Tower Corporation failed to meet the standards of a permit granted last year. “Neighbors alleged- and the supes agreed — that American Tower had failed to meet the maintenance requirements laid out in the 2009 T-mobile conditional use permit.” Things like landscaping, keeping it graffiti-free, etc. Congrats, anti antenna movement. Now our cellphones will continue to not work.

CurbedSF got it right. Under federal law, SF’s Board of Supervisors cannot deny a permit for wireless antennas on the basis of scientifically unproven health risks. The antennas themselves are regulated by the Federal Communications Commission, so if a Supervisor wants to kill the antennas, he needs to come up with a different reason.  Ergo, barring the antennas because the tower’s control station is covered with graffiti. (Although, here it must be noted that the the facility was recently repainted, even though some graffiti has already returned.)

When I contacted the owner of the antennas, the American Tower Company, to get their side of the story, they said, “We have no comment while we evaluate the decision by the Board of Supervisors.”

As I watched this Great Bernal Hill Antenna Battle unfold over the course of this year,  the attitudes of some of our anti-antenna neighbors became particularly disheartening. I was present on some of the mailing lists where “action alerts” about the anti-antenna campaign were distributed, and it was some extremely silly stuff. Here’s an excerpt from an email sent on August 1, 2010:

These high intensity microwave antennas would operate point-to-point and have line-of-sight transmission with other dishes around the City rather than using the fiber optics that are typical of other companies. If any of these dishes go out of alignment (due to an earthquake or disturbance of the structures onto which they would be attached), these highly directional beams may cross the path of people and expose them to radiation levels above FCC limits.

Upon reading this, a very patient and knowledgeable gentleman who said he previously worked with microwave transmission systems at Lawrence Berkeley Labs replied to reassure the antenna worry-warts. He wrote:

Microwaves are in no way related to nuclear radiation and have no radioactive source, they’re very much the same as radio waves your AM or FM radio receives, just at a different frequency.

The power used by microwave communication dishes is far less than a typical microwave oven, most microwave ovens leak more energy than a microwave communication system. The frequencies used for microwave communications are the same as those used by your oven and WiFi access points, the only difference is that the access point you have in your house is designed to transmit in every direction, so you’re always exposed, and a dish is designed to transmit as a beam. Think of a light bulb that illuminates an entire room and a flashlight that puts a spot on the wall, exactly the same principle is used; the dish on Bernal Hill would be performing the same function as the parabolic mirror in a flashlight.

NAME REDACTED is concerned about the microwave beam hitting a person in the event of an earthquake. I understand the concern but it is unfounded. First, the equipment is designed to turn off within a fraction of a second of the dishes becoming misaligned. Even if that failed (which is very unlikely) if you did walk in front of the dish while it was on not much would happen. I know, I’ve done it many times.

His effort was pointless, because the anti-antenna NIMBY had zero interest in listening:

To our knowledge, no scientific study on the potential health risks or environmental risks of this project has been done. While we appreciate everyone’s perspectives, we believe that until this happens, everyone’s opinions about the relative health risks involved are just that, opinions.

Get that? This particular project requires an Environmental Impact Report, even though tens of thousands of identical such systems are in use worldwide. (HINT: Whenever you hear the battle cry of “We need an EIR!” you know you are in the presence of an intractable Enemy of Progress.)

The NIMBY’s last comment reminded me of a shrewd  insight by the late Sen. Daniel Patrick Moynihan: “Everyone is entitled to his own opinion, but not his own facts.”

The facts about the safety of microwave antennas have been well-established for decades. And never mind that Bernal Hill was once home to a much, much larger microwave antenna array for 40 years, with no ill health effects reported.  None of that is at all relevant, because San Francisco’s antennaphobes don’t want to hear such “opinion.” They operate on the basis of their own impenetrable anxieties, and no amount of fact is likely dissuade them from their pre-determined conclusions. It’s regrettable but it must be said: These “progressive” antennaphobes revealed themselves to be knuckle-dragging reactionaries, and no different than those who would dismiss Darwinian evolution as being a mere “theory,” climate change as some sort of scientific snow-job, and fluoridated water as a Communist conspiracy. *sigh*

Alas, true progress — the meaningful kind, which matters a great deal to thousands of Bernal residents who want to conduct business and create new economic opportunities in our neighborhood  — requires a more sophisticated telecommunications infrastructure than we have now. So will we get it?

Supervisor David Campos. Photo by San Francisco LGBT Community Center

I put a call in to Supervisor David Campos to ask that very question. It’s to be expected that a few neighborhood activists zealots will into a tizzy from time to time; why did the Board of Supervisors yield to their frenzied whims?

During our conversation, Supervisor Campos stood by the publicly stated reason for the Board’s refusal to permit the new antennas. “A conditional use was given, but the conditions [regarding the landscaping and appearance of the tower facility] were not met,” he said. “There’s no excuse. When we tell a vendor to do something, they should do what we say.”

Then what of the potential health impacts of mobile base station antennas?

“We had no basis to deny the request on health grounds,” Campos said, adding, “We’ve asked the FCC to conduct further study on the health implications of these devices.”

Why? What are those health implications?

“I don’t have any evidence of a health risk,” Campos said. “But many people have raised those issues, so they are a concern. Science changes all the time, so we should be cautious, even if there is no scientific evidence that this technology is a health hazard.”

Okay, so we should be wary, even though we have no credible reason to be wary. Of course. I then asked Supervisor Campos to summarize what he has done to expand the wireless infrastructure in Bernal Heights and improve mobile coverage in our neighborhood.

“It’s a problem,” he conceded. “A better approach is to take a comprehensive look at this, as a way to improve service. I hope that happens down the road.”

So there we have it: All it takes to kill an effort to provide Bernal Heights and our surrounding neighborhoods with some 21st century wireless technology is a group of addled NIMBYs and a thin veneer of recently applied graffiti. But improving service requires a master plan. Which may get written. After some research. Someday. Perhaps.

Bottom line: Don’t count on your mobile reception getting any better, anytime soon. And so while our elected officials take their time pondering solutions to our telecommunications woes, Bernalwood would like to offer you a new product that may be of interest to partisans on *both* sides of the Great Antenna Divide: It’s a combination tinfoil beanie and wireless signal booster that promises to both shield users from RF radiation *and* reduce the frequency of dropped calls. You can see it in the photo above, and look for it soon at finer Cortland merchants, Sharper Image stores, or a SkyMall catalog near you!

Crimewatch: Home Robbery at Gunpoint

Car 040

Let’s be careful out there, people!

From the SF Examiner’s Law and Disorder blog this morning:

A Bernal Heights resident who made the unfortunate mistake of answering his door Monday was robbed by two suspects at gunpoint.

At about 9:30 p.m., the victim heard some knocks on the door of his apartment in the 100 block of Highland Avenue, according to the San Francisco Police Department.

At the door was a black male, who spoke with the victim and distracted him while a second man, an Asian male, entered through the unit’s rear door. While the victim was talking to the man on the doorstep, the second suspect approached him from behind, pointed a gun at him and demanded cash, police said.

UPDATE: Here’s some additional detail from the SFPD’s Ingelside Station crime blotter:

09:21 pm       100 blk Highland                Robbery w/ Gun
Officer Lim and Shugars with Officers Archilla and Kneuker responded to a robbery call.  The victim, a pizza delivery man, was held up at gunpoint by an African American male and Filipino male accomplice.  The victim delivered the ordered food to the door and the Filipino suspect answered, took the food and retreated into the home to get some change.  The African American suspect approached the victim and forced him into the house where both suspects then robbed him of his money.  The suspects then fled together out of the back of the building.  Officers searched the area for the suspects to no avail.  CSI responded to process the scene.  Report number 101126062

Image: Telstar Logistics

What San Francisco Landmarks Talk About When They Talk Amongst Themselves

When you scan the horizon from atop Bernal Hill, San Francisco’s most prominent landmarks look staid, majestic… and extremely quiet. But don’t be fooled. In fact, over on Twitter, the city’s landmarks are talking among themselves — and sometimes they crack themselves up.

Here’s one such exchange that took place last weekend between Sutro Tower, the Bay Bridge, the TransAmerica Building, and One Rincon:

Your December Real Estate Report for Bernalwood

Paradise
Danielle Lazier recently started following Bernalwood over on the Twitter.

Danielle is a realtor with Zephyr Real Estate, and the author of SFHotlist, so I sent her a note to get the inside skinny on residential sales trends in our sexy and glamorous neighborhood. Here’s what she said:

Quick stats from Bernal Heights housing market over past 90 days:

Quick stats from Bernal Heights housing market over past 90 days:
•    40 homes listings currently for sale
•    26 homes in escrow or pending sale
•    30 homes have sold (past 3 months)
•    Most expensive home sold = $1,370,000
•    Least expensive home sold = $375,000 (Um, that’s a $995,000 spread!)
•    Median home price = $807,000
•    Average days on market (how long it takes to sell a home) = 50 days
•    Average sales price / list price = 100.87%

The Bernal Heights real estate market is all over the map, quite literally! As you know, it’s a pretty big MLS district, ranging from Cesar Chavez to Alemany Ave on the North/South sides to San Jose Ave & 101 on the East/West. As such, the real estate (and the real estate market) is quite varied. Basically, it all comes down to pricing….if a listing is “priced to sell” it will, in fact, sell! For example, right now, there are 40 single family homes for sale and over the past 3 months, 30 listings have sold. Some houses sold super-fast, as in 7 days, but the average time it took to sell a house in Bernal was 50 days. Some listings went for as much as 8% over the asking price, and some for 14% under the list price (Note to sellers: don’t overprice!) but on average homes sold for right around list price.

What matters most? Location, location, location. Homes in the most coveted parts of Bernal, i.e. just off Cortland Ave or north slope, command the most money AND sell the quickest. Of course, the property’s condition matters too. Price and prep the house correctly and it will sell… in San Francisco, and definitely in Bernal Heights, selling for top dollar entails staging the home and pricing it just under perceived market value to draw a crowd.

Given national trends, this is pretty encouraging stuff for homeowners, and wannabe Bernal buyers alike. Bernalwood. So hot right now. Bernalwood.

SPECIAL NOTE TO PRICKLY LA LENGUANS: Danielle Lazier’s views on the Bernal Heights MLS are strictly her own, and do not reflect the opinions of the Overlords of Bernalwood, nor do they represent a change in Bernalwood’s munificent support for the La Lengua Autonomous Zone. Carry on.

IMAGE: Bernalwood West, as seen from the roof of St. Luke’s Hospital. By Don Franco.

Christmas on Cortland: A Holiday Stroll on December 9

Happy holidays
It’s Christmas on Cortland, and the merchants of the Bernal Business Alliance (Yay!) are organizing a Holiday Evening Stroll on Thursday, December 9 from 6 to 9 pm.

Some enticements:

  • Hot mulled cider at Spice Hound
  • Lardo and some other tasty tastys from Avedano’s
  • Grog and cookies at Heartfelt
  • Wine tasting and hors d’oeuvres (in the back) at Liberty Cafe
  • Drink specials and cookies at Stray Bar
  • (Noticing a theme here?)
  • Live music and Happy Cowboy BBQ at the Bernal Heights Neighborhood Center
  • A Holiday-themed costume contest for dogs at Bernal Beast
  • and more…

Here’s a map of the participating businesses.

See you there? A few Bernalwood folk will be merrily roaming the streets. I’ll be the one walking with a young child.  (Bwaaaaaaahahah!)

Image: Top, Steve Rhodes