Month: July 2011

Is Steve Wozniak Buying Weed in Bernal Heights?

/ Todd_Lappin / 5 Comments

Bernal Heights Collective

Does this count as a Celebrity Sighting?

EITHER someone is doing a very rude impersonation of Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak on Twitter and Foursquare, OR the real Steve Wozniak just checked in at the Bernal Heights Collective to replenish his medical stash.

UPDATE: Apparently, this was posted by a rude impersonator. In the comments, Shason and Bigethan point out that @stevewoz is the verified Woz. Good thing, too, because @appleinnovator seemed too vain, and posting from BHC seemed too unwise. That said, the real Woz doth perhaps overshare as well.

PHOTO: Telstar Logistics

Alemany Farmer’s Market Report: “Berry Hip” July Edition

/ Todd_Lappin / 4 Comments

It’s grey, cold, and cloudy today in Bernalwood, but (lest we forget) it’s sunny and hot outside the City. And that means it’s prime season for mid-summer produce at the Alemany Farmer’s Market. Woo-hoo!

I dropped by Alemany on Saturday to survey the merchandise, and the inventory was looking good. Of course, heirloom tomatoes were de rigeur:

Alemany - June 2011

It looks like regular tomatoes are still a few weeks away from their peak (spelling errors notwithstanding):

Alemany - June 2011

Juicy peaches were generating significant transactional volume:

Alemany - June 2011

Alemany - June 2011

For the budget-conscious, one guy was selling flats of “cosmetically challenged” peaches off the back of a truck:

Cosmetically Challenged

Our Asian friends swarmed around the vendor selling tiny ears of yellow sticky corn.

Alemany - June 2011

I’d never tried sticky corn before, but fortunately they were giving away cooked samples. It is noticeably less sweet — and yes, more sticky — than the stuff I typically associate with summer. I liked it, and so did this kid:

Alemany - June 2011

For Francophiles, there was enough lavander on hand to induce Proustian reveries of Aix en Provence:

Alemany - June 2011

And of course, the berries were off the hook:

Alemany - June 2011

Alemany - June 2011

Alemany - June 2011

Executive Summary: Get thee to Alemany ASAP in the weeks ahead, while the gettin’ is still so so good!

PHOTOS: Telstar Logistics

Crimewatch: Robbery at Gunpoint on Anderson Last Night

/ Todd_Lappin / 12 Comments

Yikes! KTVU brings the details about a gunpoint robbery that happened last night:

The robbery was reported at about 10:55 p.m. near the intersection of Anderson Street and Eugenia Avenue.

The 28-year-old victim was getting out of her car when two men approached her, according to police.

One pulled out a handgun and demanded the woman’s property and she complied, handing over her purse, an iPod, a cellphone and cash, police said.

The men ran away and had not been found as of this morning.

The victim was not injured in the robbery.

The SFPD is looking for the baddies, so if you have any intel, please call the anonymous tip line at (415) 575-4444.

 


Dog Owners Love New Park But Lament Lost Garbage Can

/ Todd_Lappin / 16 Comments

No sooner had the ribbon been cut at the new Vista Pointe mini-park on Bernal Hill than some dog owners began complaining in the comments that although the new park is grand, somewhere along the line the City removed the garbage can that used to sit at the northeast corner of the lot.

That left pet owners with no place to deposit their doggy-doo, so some have apparently launched a poop-in to protest the disappearance of their beloved trash receptacle. New neighbor RallyP — a dog owner — created the graphic above, and he summarizes the scene:

We’re already seeing evidence of either civil disobedience, or just plain laziness and rudeness (or both?). Hopefully they’re just replacing the old garbage can with something newer and better. Otherwise, this may become a more common sight here 😦

So, paging our friends at City DPW. Heeeeeelp!!! Any chance we can get that garbage can back?

UPDATE: 7 July, 2011

This just came in via the Twitter:

Translated: According to Julian Wyler, the local celebrity who organized the Vista Pointe minipark project, the City Department of Public Works planned to install a new garbage can across the street from the park, but that hasn’t happened. So now it’s time to nag. Please place a call via the 311 telephone hotline to express your desire to have the replacement trash can installed.

IMAGE: goingWest

House Portrait: Chalkboard Garage on Mullen Ave.

/ Todd_Lappin / 26 Comments

Chalkboard House

Chalkboard House

Deep in the depths of Mullen Avenue, there’s a 1950s-style house with two garage doors that have been painted with chalkboard paint. And if you look closely, you’ll find a tidy bucket of chalk sticks sitting at the foot of the doors, in case you feel inspired to make an artistic, political, cultural, territorial, or culinary statement.

Chalkboard House

Wonderful!

PHOTOS: Telstar Logistics

For Sale: One (1) Liberty Cafe, Beloved by Bernalwood

/ Todd_Lappin / 7 Comments

Liberty Cafe

Woa.  The sleuths at InsideScooped have uncovered some unsettling news: The Liberty Cafe on Cortland is for sale:

Bernal Heights mainstay and all-American charmer Liberty Cafe is for sale and looking for a buyer.

Liberty Cafe first opened in 1994, with Zuni vet Cathie Guntli at the helm. It soon earned three stars and Top 100 status for years to come. Michael Bauer even remarked, in 2001, that diners should “consider it like driving to Grandma’s for dinner; it’s worth the trip even if you have to pay.” Guntli passed away in 2009, at which point Stuart Bai of Sally’s and Tony Hua of Hard Knox Cafe bought the place.

But now, it’s back on the market. Some stats from the listing: 2000 square feet, 66 Total Seats (34 in cafe, 12 in bakery and 20 on the patio), comes with a Type 41 liquor license (beer/wine only), “excellent feng shui” and a current rent of $3K/month. The pricetag appears to be $275K.

PHOTO: Telstar Logistics

High-Tech Governmental Organic Autonomous Trimming System Deployed to Manage Overgrown Bernal Property

/ Todd_Lappin / 6 Comments

Bernalwood is pleased to report that the City has deployed an innovative, high-tech solution to maintain the grass around Bernal Reservoir.

These new units are biofuel-powered, and they come pre-loaded with navigational subroutines that enable fully autonomous mulching and trimming operation within preset geographic boundaries. City bureaucrats call it the Governmental Organic Autonomous Trimming System (GOATS), and by all indications, these units deliver significant value to taxpayers.

Reader Tony brings the details (and a video):

The SFPUC has been using goats to clear the weeds and grass in the adjacent lot at the reservoir on the corner of Appleton and Elsie, for fire prevention. It is something my wife and dogs look forward to, as my wife had goats growing up in Ohio and my dogs get a kick from them. They are really smart and very friendly like a dog — just stay away from the scent glands on their heads, because they smell like goat milk cheese x1000.

It’s really great when your City can use a simple sustainable technique for doing a necessary job instead of the typical smelly & loud two stroke weed-wacker that fouls the air and disturbs the peace.

Awesome. Here’s a video of GOATS in action.

VIDEO: Courtesy of Tony

Prop 13, Tom Ammiano’s Ridiculously Low Property Taxes, and The New York Times (Not Necessarily In That Order)

/ Todd_Lappin / 13 Comments

By way of introducing us to a new proposal by State Assemblyman Tom Ammiano to close a Prop 13 loophole used by some commercial real estate owners to keep their property tax obligations ridiculously low, today’s New York Times points out that Mr. Ammiano has made no effort to change the provisions that allow some residential homeowners to pay ridiculously low property taxes.

The Times then notes that Mr. Ammiano himself is a “signal beneficiary” of the residential provision, and — with a somewhat conspicuous amount of glee — the paper also details just how little property tax Mr. Ammiano actually pays for his Bernal Heights home:

Mr. Ammiano, who is also a comedian, pays just $530 a year in taxes on the Bernal Heights home he has owned since 1974. As far as the city and Proposition 13 are concerned, his house is worth $45,600. Zillow estimates its current worth at $645,000. At that value, the tax would be about $7,500.

How good a deal is this? Imagine for a moment that Mr. Ammiano’s house was a car. If he parked the car at a metered space near his Civic Center office, the amount he now contributes each day to the commonweal in the form of property tax would buy just a hair less than 29 minutes, curbside.

Perhaps his next stand-up routine could be built around this theme: San Francisco on $1.45 a Day.

There is nothing illegal about Mr. Ammiano’s good fortune. As long as a property does not change hands, Proposition 13 limits annual increases to 2 percent or the rate of inflation, whichever is less.

The Times then compares Tom Ammiano’s property taxes to those of his next-door neighbor, Anthony Costa, who’s lives in a home that is almost identical. Mr. Costa, a City College librarian, bought his home in 2004 and pays $8400 per year in property taxes. Not surprisingly, Mr. Costa is displeased:

While he says he bears his neighbor no ill-will, what Mr. Costa does object to — strenuously — is the reduction in government services he attributes squarely to Proposition 13.

“Prop 13 is a tragedy which has made things in California worse every year since it was passed,” Mr. Costa wrote in an e-mail. “The people of California have to settle for inferior schools, libraries, transit, roads, sewers, parks and other services. I don’t object as much to my personal tax bill, as I do the obscene discrepancy between the great wealth of this state and the relative poverty of our government and public institutions.”

Let the debate begin…

PHOTO: The New York Times

Ye Shall Walk Bernal Streets, And Know They Are Steepest

/ Todd_Lappin / 25 Comments

This probably does not come as news to the Citizens of Bernalwood, but there are some pretty steep hills in our neighborhood-on-a-hill. And some pretty steep streets that climb those steep hills too. Yet according to the “official stats,” Bernal’s streets are not the steepest:

Now, if you’re willing to believe that official list, then I have a California balanced budget proposal I’d like you to vote on. Here’s the truth: Independent analysts at the excellent Data Pointed blog have concluded that the official steep list is complete and utter B.S.

And not only that, they have also concluded that several of the steepest hills in the city are actually in Bernal Heights.

And not only that, they also, also concluded that the steepest paved street in San Francisco — and quite possibly the entire world! — is a 30-foot section of Bradford Street near Tompkins, just north of the Alemany Farmer’s Market.

Data Pointed explains:

Bradford Street, climbs eagerly from Tompkins Avenue at twenty-percent grade. Then, after 150 feet, the slope doubles, and the concrete poops out. “Anyone wanna take over?!” it yells.

“I does!” hollers the insane asphalt driveway! And lickety split, there’s a perilous, oil-stained jump to the private property above: not “country club” private, mind you, but theother kind, wherein the gap-toothed inhabitants take mighty unkindly to camera-waving interlopers. […]

Carefully, I scaled the beast and measured it: a solid 30 feet of sustained 41% grade! On such a slope, gravity alone pulls a one-ton car downhill with 800 pounds of force, accelerating it from zero to sixty in 7.2 seconds. Whoa Nellie!

Congratulations, Bradford Street above Tompkins, for, having Bravely Thrust into the Forty-Percent-Plus Frontier, you now stand alone atop the Peak Of Maximum Grades as the Most Tilted Paved Urban Thoroughfare In The World!

In a similar vein, Data Pointed has conducted field surveys on hilly streets around the City, and with said data in hand, here’s how their Steepest Hill leaderboard looks right now. (Annotations added):

Amazing, eh? Four of the 10 steepest streets in San Francisco are in Bernal Heights. Fellow Citizens, this could become an economic bonanza for us all. Consider the opportunities:

  • Bernal becomes a glamorous onsite location for filming leg-burning fitness videos or MTV/Jackass-style reality television shows.
  • Ski Bernalwood could extend lift service to Bradford, to open up some new wintersports terrain.
  •  Heartfelt could become a retail colossus simply by selling t-shirts that look like this:

Because let’s face it: Bernal Heights may not always be the smartest, or the prettiest, or the most popular neighborhood in the world. But we may rest secure in the knowledge that we will always be the steepest.

IMAGE: Top, Bradford’s 41% grade. Photo by Data Pointed

Looking Down South Van Noir

/ Todd_Lappin / 2 Comments

There are plenty of photos floating around the Interwebs that capture the view from Bernal Hill, looking north down South Van Ness. There’s also a really good reason for this: It’s an awesome view that comes in a lot of different flavors, depending on each photographers’ mixture of light, lens, and perspective.

This picture by Jason Rodman is called “All Roads Lead to the Tenderloin,” and that’s a perfect name for an image that feels so noir.

PHOTO: Jason Rodman