Tonight: Mysterious Meeting to Establish Parking Permits for North Bernal

July 28, 2015July 28, 2015 / Todd_Lappin / 91 Comments

Neighbor MM spotted handbills from the so-called “Northeast Bernal Parking Alliance” drifting around Precitaville. Apparently, there’s a meeting tonight, Tuesday, July 28 at 7 pm at the Precita Valley Neighborhood Center to discuss a proposal to turn much of North Bernal into an official Residential Permit Parking (RPP) zone. Neighbor MM writes:

Perhaps you have seen these around? I am always a little suspicious about things like this with no email address or URL, and I can’t find anything online when I search Northeast Bernal Parking Alliance. Which leads me to believe this is the work of one irate neighbor who is about to ruin things for all of us. My opinion: While I’ve noticed some parking problems, notably neighbors leaving their cars in the same spot for weeks or months on end, people need to realize that once you call in the DPT – there is no undo. Sure one person from Google might get a ticket, but once the DPT begins patrolling the streets and marking up cars, we the residents will get the bulk of the tickets. Nearly every driveway on my street sports at least 20 cars that are parked in driveways and are kind of sort of a little bit blocking the sidewalk. Ticket! When we go away and have relatives housesit? Ticket! A friend from another neighborhood coming by for lunch and a long walk? Can’t park here! I lived in the Mission prior to Bernal and residents fought to get two hour parking on our street and I didn’t think much about it – until I realized my car was registered in San Mateo, not San Francisco, and I couldn’t get a permit. It was a huge pain for me, and all the things I mentioned above happened. It is not worth it. It is already illegal to park for more than 72 hours and that takes care of the big problems. People parking for the day? Shrug. In many cases it is merely an exchange. I leave and drive to work and someone takes my place, leaves at the end of the day and I take it back. It’s okay. I’ll go to this meeting but I urge people to consider what it means when the DPT starts patrolling. YOU get the ticket, not some imaginary bus riding tech worker from the Marina.

Hmmm. We do wonder: Why does the graphic on the handbill include so many question marks? Who is the “Northeast Bernal Parking Alliance?” Who are they allied with? Is this another one of those Ron Conway organizations that seeks to further gentrify San Francisco? Or is it instead the leading edge of yet another imperialist Calle24 plot to annex North Bernal and transform it into a private parking preserve? To get answers to these and other questions, attend the meeting tonight:

Register NOW to Sell Your Treasure at the 2015 Bernal Heights Hillside Garage Sale

July 27, 2015 / Todd_Lappin / 2 Comments

Attention, all ye Bernalese pack-rats with the urge to purge! The 2015 Bernal Heights Hillwide Garage Sale happens on August 8 — less than two weeks from today, so now is the time to register your address to appear on the high-tech 2015 Hillside Garage Sale Treasure Map.

Hillwide Garage Sale co-organizer and Neighbor Michael Minson explains how to participate:

I’m pleased to announce the Hillwide.com website is now live and ready to accept registrations for the great garage sale of 2015 taking place on Saturday, August 8 from 9 am -2 pm.

Hillwide is a San Francisco tradition, and a fabulous way for our Hillbabies to unload their crap, clear their clutter, and otherwise rightsize their lives both for cash and existential bliss.

The Hillwide is arguably the largest single day garage sale in San Francisco. Last year, we raised $1,860 for the Bernal Heights Neighborhood Center strictly from map registrations. This year, our goal is to beat that like a vintage rug from grandma’s earthquake cottage.

If you’ve been hankering for a cleansing, drink a kale juice smoothie and clean out the deepest corners of your garage, basement, bonus room or creepy storage place.

Register your treasure trove and make your donation to the BHNC via the world-famous Internet at hillwide.com.

Then just open your garage door on Saturday, 8-August, put on some funky grooves and pour yourself a mimosa (or three), because Hillwide is on!

The Hillwide elves will promote the event across the city and bring the masses to your doorstep. But you have to register for the plundering masses to find you.

Tonight: Phonographic Memories Picks Up the Beat, Moves to Glamorous New Bernal Nightclub Location

June 30, 2015June 30, 2015 / Todd_Lappin

You may remember that way back in September 2014, Neighbor Corey launched a project called Phonographic Memory by hosting informal, open-mike sessions at the Bernal Heights library where people were invited to share stories and music from their favorite old vinyl records.

Phonographic Memory has now become a regular thing, and here’s how it goes down:

Now Phonographic Memory graduates from the Bernal library and relocates to Bernal’s stretch of Mission Street, where you can join in tonight, June 30, at 7 pm at the Knockout (3223 Mission @Valencia).

Neighbor Corey brings the news, and the invitation:

For June, we have a very special edition of Phonographic Memory planned for you. We’re throwing a party! We’re making the trek from our usual spot at the Bernal Library down the hill to The Knockout, because libraries close early, and we want to party together all night long.

We’ve curated a diverse lineup of individuals who have contributed to the Bay Area music scene: Justin Torres (record dealer and DJ who helped re-ignite soul singer Darondo’s career), Lydia Popovich (stand-up comedian who managed Quannum records in the early 2000’s), Dan Lactose (guitarist for seminal punk/powerviolence band Spazz, producer for Hip-Hop duo Grand Invincible), and Winston Smith (artist responsible for designing the Dead Kennedy’s logo as well as countless album covers).

We have DJ’s Brycon, Wam Bam Ashleyanne and Stef providing the soundtrack to rock the night away.

The event will serve as a fundraiser of sorts, and will be complimented by an IndieGoGo campaign. We are asking a $5 donation at the door, and guarantee that you will be entertained!

Our goal is to obtain non-profit status, and ultimately secure grants to grow Phonographic Memory into a global community.

Music starts at 7:00pm, stories at 8:00. Hope to see you there!

Friday: Last Call to See Bernal Artist Bernie Lubell’s Beautiful Homemade Airship

June 25, 2015June 25, 2015 / Todd_Lappin / 2 Comments

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A few weeks ago, Bernal artist Bernie Lubell reached out to the Bernalwood News Desk to tell us he was building an airship in his Bernal Heights garage.

Normally, that would be a shocking! revelation! But it’s to be expected from Neighbor Bernie, who was last seen in 2014 constructing a giant Rube Goldberg machine in his Bernal Heights garage. So the manufacture of an airship came as little surprise.

Anyway, Neighbor Bernie’s airship is the centerpiece of a new show called Up in the Air at the fabulous Southern Exposure Gallery in the Mission:

From June 13-27, artist Bernie Lubell installs his workshop and collaborates with visitors to create new work. Lubell creates wood mechanical metaphors for the human condition. Gears, pulleys, bellows, valves, levers, human force and sophisticated engineering power his interactive wooden machines. As an artist who has lived and worked in the Bay Area for 40 years, his influence is felt in the work of many local artists.

Collaborate with Bernie as he sets out to build an airship in the gallery at Southern Exposure. In two workshops and ongoing studio hours, visitors and Bernie will work together to create an air powered flying machine inspired by Frederick Marriott’s 1869 airship Avitor, expanding on Bernie’s ongoing research into breath and the force of air.

The show is winding down, but don’t panic! You can still see the work.

Neighbor Bernie tells us there’s a glamourous closing party happening tomorrow evening, Friday, June 26, from 6 – 8 pm at Southern Exposure… and of course you get in free if you show the top-secret Bernal hand signal:

Closing Party for Up In the Air
Join Southern Exposure for a celebration of Bernie Lubell’s work and everything that was created together over the past two weeks during his exhibition Up In the Air.
Friday, June 26, 2015, 6:00 – 8:00 PM
Southern Exposure (3030 20th Street, SF)
FREE

PHOTO: Neighbor Bernie’s airship at Southern Exposure on Sunday, June 21, 2015. Photo by Bernie Lubell

Save the Date: The 2015 Bernal Heights Hillwide Garage Sale Happens on August 8

June 24, 2015June 24, 2015 / Todd_Lappin

Dear Neighbors, the Season of The Purge is almost upon us.

On Saturday, August 8, 2015, Bernal Heights will hold the annual Hillwide Garage Sale, during which all the Citizens of Bernalwood will have the opportunity to sell-off all the worldly ~~crap~~ treasures that now clutter and oppress your closets and garages.

The Hillwide Garage Sale is a Bernal Heights tradition, and we’ll have more details soon on how to register your home to appear on the magical High-Tech Treasure Map.

But for now, just mark your calendar, and start sorting through your surplus stuff to figure out what you want to unload. Because you’ll feel so much better when you do.

Wednesday: A Conversation About Parking Woes in North Bernal

June 23, 2015June 23, 2015 / Todd_Lappin / 79 Comments

Amid all the highly energized conversations happening in Our Faire City about scarce housing, a growing population, a booming economy, exclusionary zoning, and nativist resentment, it’s somewhat remarkable that there has been so relatively little anxiety expressed in recent years about street parking in Bernal Heights.

Apart from the usual tempo of passive aggressive parking note gems, the Bernalwood Public Sentiment Tracking System has not detected much recent change in the intensity of conversation about street parking — other than to say that the conversation is always somewhat intense. But beneath the surface, tensions have come to a boil. According to a new handbill circulating in North Bernal, the parkopalypse is here, and the time for an Urgent Conversation About Street Parking is now.

Tomorrow, June 24, at 7 pm in the Precita Neighborhood Center, an ad hoc group of Bernal neighbors will gather to commiserate about street parking and discuss what is to be done. If that sounds like your kind of thing, then this may be just the kind of thing for you.

Oh, and if you go, please report back here on the outcome.

PHOTO: Above, Neighbor Simon; below, Telstar Logistics

Sunday: Join Neighbors Annie Sprinkle and Beth Stephens for an Ecosexy Walking Tour of Bernal Hill

June 19, 2015June 19, 2015 / Todd_Lappin / 4 Comments

This weekend, glamorous Bernal neighbor and sex-positive superstars Annie Sprinkle and Beth Stephens kick off a series of Pride Week events related to their Here Come the Ecosexuals project.

The ecocitement begins this weekend, with a pair of exploration walks on Bernal Hill. And since you’re so supersexy, you’re invited:

This Sunday, June 21 meet us – Annie Sprinkle and Beth Stephens – at our sparkly blue ‘Pollination Pod’. We will be doing two walking tours of Bernal Hill at 10:30am and 5:00pm.

You’ll be greeted by us and our friendly scouts: Pale Breast, Kalash, and Maria Ramirez. The adventure begins with Ecosex Orientation, then we’ll locate some E-spots (ecosexy spots) and explore ways to make love to the Earth through the senses.

Local environmental issues will be brought out into the open. There will be plenty of adventure and drama will ensue. The show will include a special water toast and culminate at the golden stone. By the end of the walking tour you’ll have an ‘ecosexual gaze’ and you might discover that you are an ecosexual too!

When: June 21st, at 10:30am (meet at 10:15am) and 5:00pm (Meet at 4:45pm) at our garage next to

Where: On the south side of Bernal Hill in San Francisco. The walking tour begins at the south entrance to Bernal Heights Park, on Bernal Heights Blvd. one block west of Anderson Street. Look for the bright blue ‘Pollination Pod’ trailer.

Cost: Free! Project is funded by our grantors and collaborating organizations. Donations welcome.

P.S. Both tours will be filmed. If you do not want to be filmed we will give you a special hat to wear so our videographer makes sure not to catch you on film!

We will have free snacks and kombucha after the tours for our walkers and our neighbors from our sponsors: Becka Shertzer of Brazen Nector, GT Kombucha, and Peeple’s Donut Farm.

PHOTO: Annie Sprinkle and Beth Stephens, by Manuel Vason with Guillermo Gomez Pena

Wednesday: Show and Tell About the History of Cortland Avenue

June 17, 2015June 19, 2015 / Todd_Lappin / 6 Comments

If you’ve already picked out the outfit you’re planning to wear for tomorrow’s Summer Stroll (PRO TIPS: boas, seersucker, vintage Mork & Mindy rainbow suspenders), then here’s a perfect way to get in the strolling spirit …

Tonight, June 17 at 7 pm in the Bernal Heights Library, your time-traveling neighbors from the Bernal Heights History Project are holding a special show-and-tell about the history of Cortland Avenue:

This month’s Bernal History Project meeting is a joint presentation with the good folks at our Bernal branch library. It’s a special evening dedicated to sharing the history of Cortland Avenue. We’ll be showing a selection of photos, ads, and news articles about Bernal’s main shopping thoroughfare. (Sorry, Precita and North Bernal neighbors — we promise we’ll do a slideshow about you very soon!)

We invite you to attend and bring your own memories of shopping and living on Cortland. If you’d like to say a few words on the night, please drop us a line beforehand — maybe we can get a real live show-and-tell going. Audience participation is positively encouraged!We’ll have volunteers from SFPL on hand to record your Cortland-related stories and memories. If you’d like to bring photos and news clippings to share, we can get those scanned for our archives, too.

Oh, in case you’re having a hard time getting oriented to that photo up top, it’s a pitcture of Cortland avenue on October 11, 1909, looking east from Bocana. Here’s an annotated guide:

And because it’s de rigeur, let’s zoom and enhance:

PHOTO: Cortland Avenue, 1909. From the SFMTA Photo Archive

Thursday: Come Out for Two Glamorous Summer Strolls Along Two Bernal Streets

June 16, 2015June 16, 2015 / Todd_Lappin / 5 Comments

As you know, for tens of thousands of years, the ancient druids who once populated our lands gathered each year on Bernal Hill during the longest day of the year to celebrate the arrival of summer and the harvest of the seasonal foodstuffs that brought them joy and sustenance.

This year, for the first time in the history of the galaxy, this ancient Bernal ritual will begin a new chapter, as our two merchant tribes from Cortlandia and La Lengua will each hold a Solstice Celebration on the same night, and in the same spirit, at the same time — on two different streets.

Specifically, on Thursday night, June 18, the shamans from the Bernal Business Alliance will hold the 2015 Summer Solstice Stroll on glamorous Cortland Avenue. Simultaneously, the high priestesses from the Mission Bernal Merchants Association will hold their first-ever Summer Stroll along the bustling flatland sidewalks of Mission Street between Randall and Cesar Chavez.

The MBMA’s Mission Street Summer Stroll happens on Thursday from 4 to 7:30 pm:

Don’t miss this Thursday’s Mission Bernal Merchants Association SUMMER STROLL! Look for food specials, art events and other fun activities up and down the street. Participating businesses include Ichi Sushi, BEL, Secession Art and Design, The Blue Plate SF, Iron & Gold, Virgil’s Sea Room, The Front Porch, Cafe St. Jorge, The Rock Bar, Cole Hardware, The Knockout and more!

Food Specials:
— ICHI Kakiya – $1 Oysters; Happy Hour Food & Drink Specials
— ICHI Sushi – Izakaya Happy Hour
— Bel Happy Hour Belgian Food & Drink Specials
— The Blue Plate — 3 –course prix fixe meatloaf /Fried Chicken /Rose Flight
— Iron & Gold — Amelia Ray will be performing 5-7 pm.
– $6 Celery Chavez: Tequila, muddled mint, fresh lemon, simple syrup & celery bitters.
– $6 Manhattan: Bourbon, sweet vermouth & bitters.
– $3 beers on tap. $5 well drinks.
— Virgil’s Sea Room — $1 off draft beers and our $5 Mules, Margaritas and Micheladas until 8 PM

Art:
— Secession Art and Design — Live Painting/Drawing, TBD; discounting the 94110 shirts
— Avenue
– Jaewon Lee, a 10 year old graffiti artist,
– Painting a canvas outside space from 5 PM to 7 PM
– Little Green Cyclo truck in front of our space with a stroll special
– Josh and the Klipptones play from 5 PM to 7 PM
– Henna Tattoos

Fun Events:
— The Front Porch — hop scotch and free popcorn on the porch from 4 till 6:30. Fried chicken samples will go on till the end. .
— The Rock Bar— Drink Specials
— Cafe St. Jorge — Trivia Game
— The Knockout — Drunk Bingo Night

Community Info:
— Hospital Project by HerreroBoldt
— MUNI Forward
— Mission-Valencia Plaza Information

On Cortland, the Summer Stroll is on Thursday from 6 to 9 pm. Neighbor Ken from Succulence and Neighbor Darcy from Heartfelt share some of the 2015 highlights:

The Bernal Business Alliance’s annual Summer Stroll is happening Thursday evening, June 18th from 6-9pm. Many businesses up and down Cortland Ave will be taking part in this intimate neighborhood party. This year we are having a “Focus on Food” with yummy bites and drinks offered at many of your favorite shops along with some live music.

Events like the Summer Stroll and December’s Holiday Stroll are part of what makes Bernal Heights such a throwback community, with a strong emphasis on community. These nights are a great opportunity to support your local businesses while being feted by them in a show of gratitude and celebration.

Come stroll along Cortland on the 18th. Taste some treats, sip some beverages, do some summer shopping and say hello to all your favorite neighbors and store peeps as we toss our worries aside for the evening and focus on the bounty of luck that brought us to Bernal Heights in the first place.

12 Small Things
12 Small Things is having a sidewalk summer sale of handmade artisan products at 436 Cortland Ave

Bernal Homeopathy
Bernal Homeopathy and East-West Integrative Clinic will be under one roof starting July 1st at 406 Cortland Avenue, in East-West Bernal! For the stroll Bernal Homeopathy will be at 406 Cortland maybe with one or two other folks who will work at EWB, on the front porch. They will also have appetizers from Little Nepal.

Bernal Star, Vega, and Vinorosso
Bernal Star & Vega will offer “Bernal Stroll Specials”
Vinorosso will have Summer Stroll happy hour until 9pm ($4 prosecco and Lambrusco!)

Epicurean Trader
Main Event: EPICurean Sandwich Tasting
(taste and vote for our new prepared sandwich range from local Bernal Employee/Chef)
Other Events:
– Llano Seco heirloom beans and sustainably farmed meats tasting event
– Miyoko’s Kitchen Vegan Cheese tasting event
Promo: Win A $50 Gift Voucher raffle!

Heartfelt
Local one-man band cajun musician Brian Belknap will play. Mark will be making a refreshment. The Grommet is hosting a party at the store the same night. And Laura is doing free Tarot readings

Micheal Minson
Climb will have the famous Airstream parked in front of New Wheel with the bluegrass band Windy Bluegrass.

Pinhole Coffee
We have the delicious Burr Eatery on board to serve that night (burritos made in the style of Sonora, Mexico) and treats from Eatwell Farm’s Icebox. Our coffee bar will be open for purchases, too!

Red Hill Station
Red Hill is having an oyster extravaganza!

Sandy Owens Massage and Healing
Sandy Owens Massage and Healing will be at her new location at the Cutting Edge from 6:30-7:30! Eileen Claytor of the Cutting Edge will be there too serving light snacks from 6-9pm, 1000 Cortland Ave.

See you out there!

Tonight: Have Some Bernal Heights Neighborhood Center for Dinner, with Cheese and Pepperoni

June 3, 2015 / Todd_Lappin / 3 Comments

Tonight, Wednesday June 3, the folks from Patxi’s Pizza in Noe are sponsoring a special promotion to benefit the Bernal Heights Neighborhood Center. All night tonight, Patxi’s will donate 10% of revenues to BHNC.

Doesn’t matter if you eat-in at Paxti’s on 24th Street or get some of their deep-dish yum delivered to your Bernal Heights glampad — 10% of tonight’s receipts will benefit BHNC.

Rachel Ebora, BHNC’s executive director, explains what they do with the money:

BHNC has been serving the community for over 37 years, providing programs and services to over 2200 youth, seniors, and families in Bernal and surrounding neighborhoods every year through our youth and senior programs, community engagement, employment development and affordable housing work. We celebrate our neighborhood by working closely with local businesses, city agencies, and neighbors to build a strong sense of community that cares for and nurtures everyone. Plus, we throw a pretty good Fiesta on the Hill every October. As a non-profit organization, we rely on multiple sources of revenue to run programs, provide family sustaining jobs, and manage and maintain hundreds of units of affordable housing throughout the city. Every dollar counts!

PHOTOS: via BHNC and Paxti’s Pizza

Thursday: Bernal Brothers Exhibit Awesome, Big-Format Wilderness Photography

May 13, 2015May 13, 2015 / Todd_Lappin / 6 Comments

Neighbor Tim Mullen and his brother Mike are in the large-format photographic printing business, and tomorrow evening, May 14, he and his brother are hosting an exhibit of some California wilderness photos. Naturally, you are so invited:

Tim Mullen of the 200 block of Elsie Street here, writing to let you know of an event taking place on Thursday, May 14 that may be of interest to Bernalites.

I’m half of the Mullen Brothers Imaging team that made the historic photos that were on display at Pinhole Coffee. The other half of this team, Brother Mike, is working on the massive task of photo-documenting all of the lakes of Desolation Wilderness (just West of Lake Tahoe). There are hundreds of lakes there, both named and un-named. The project focusses on the natural beauty of this pristine wilderness, but also touches on the ideas of solitude in a state of 34 million people and the very timely issue of water scarcity.

On May 14, from 6 to 9 PM, our company Mullen Brothers Imaging will host a gallery exhibition of many of the images collected to date. Out gallery is at 2040 Oakdale Ave. in 94110.

PHOTO: Mullen Brothers Imaging

Thursday: Benefit at Little Nepal on Cortland to Assist Earthquake Victims

April 28, 2015April 27, 2015 / Todd_Lappin / 4 Comments

There aren’t many Nepalese restaurants on this side of the pond, but we’ve got one on Cortland, and Little Nepal is hosting a special dinner on Thursday, April 30 to help victims of the massive earthquake that struck Nepal last weekend:

Our hearts are heavy with the news of the 7.8-magnitude earthquake that rocked Nepal on Saturday, April 25, killing more than 2,500 people in the country and dozens more in surrounding nations. The earthquake also triggered an avalanche on Mount Everest, killing at least 17 people. With poor infrastructure in a densely populated area, Nepal needs our help more than ever.

Please join us in dining to help rebuild and provide aid on Thursday, April 30.

Little Nepal (925 Cortland Avenue) has graciously agreed to create a donation-only select menu for this evening only. We spoke with the Owner and Executive Chef, Prem Tamang, and he is from the district of Kavrepalanchok, Nepal. All of the cash-only donation proceeds will go directly to his hometown. The restaurant is open from 5 – 10 p.m. Come anytime! Upon your arrival, please let the host / server know that you are here for the donation-only meal. Please note that this will exclude beverages and other items off the special menu.

Please spread the word and extend this invite to your network. Together, we can eat delicious Nepalese Cuisine while making a difference.

Prem, Chasa and Sebastien

PHOTO: Courtesy of Little Nepal. Hat tip: Eater SF

Tuesday: Special Spring Wine Dinner at Blue Plate

April 27, 2015April 26, 2015 / Todd_Lappin / 3 Comments

We’ve said it before, and we’ll say it again: We, the Citizens of Bernalwood, are fortunate to have Blue Plate at our metaphorical doorstep. Blue Plate was delicious and cozy and local before delicious and cozy and local were cool, and apart from being one of the most consistently fabulous restaurants in the city, co-owner Jeff Trenam tells us Blue Plate is hosting a special event tomorrow night… and you’re invited:

We are hosting a Scribe Viticultural Society Spring Allocation pick-up dinner on Tuesday, April 28th. It’s open to the public and we will be pairing their new wines with some new menu items. Everything will be available á la carte. Adam and Andrew from Scribe should be here too.

BLUE PLATE
Scribe Spring Wine Dinner

WHO: Blue Plate and Scribe Winery
WHEN: Tuesday April 28, 2014
WHERE: Blue Plate, 3218 Mission Street (at Valencia)  San Francisco, CA 94110

WHAT: Adam and Andrew Mariani from Scribe Winery will be at Blue Plate to chat with guests. Scribe Viticultural Society members will get to pick up their spring allocations and Chef de Cuisine, Sean Thomas will serve an á la carte menu with suggested SCRIBE pairings.

RESERVATIONS: www.blueplatesf.com or call 415-282-6777

PHOTO: Blue Plate’s iconic neon sign by Erik Wilson