Daybreak this morning reveals that a vandal damaged the Epicurean Trader on Cortand overnight by spray-painting political slogans on the store’s facade.
The graffiti says: “Banal Heights” and “Traitor for the 1%.”
A hot-take analysis by the Bernalwood Office of Propaganda Research concluded that the vandal apparently suffers from a narcissistic righteousness disorder, exacerbated by feelings of contempt. Further semiotic inquiry also reveals conspicuously tidy handwriting, rote sloganeering, and an unfortunate weakness for bad puns.
Bernalwood will provide further updates as they become available.
UPDATE: Bernalwood has confirmed that Pinhole Coffee was tagged as well.